


Caught In The Grey

by Pikajimin



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Self-Destruction, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-05-04 03:11:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5318243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pikajimin/pseuds/Pikajimin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mingyu wonders what goes through Wonwoo's head on bad days.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Caught In The Grey

             Mingyu unlocks the door to his apartment. He opens the door and it’s dark. The lights are off. The window is open, and Wonwoo is sitting in front of it. A cigarette is nestled between his lips. The other male is staring out the window. Mingyu wonders if he’s having a bad day. He watches the elder male move the cigarette from his lips to between his fingers, flicking ashes out the window. Wonwoo blows smoke out the window. He quietly pads to his room and sets his backpack down. He changes into a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. He walks back into the living room and sits next to Wonwoo.

            He waits for the elder male to say something, but on days like this Wonwoo won’t acknowledge him. (The elder male is lost in his own world and struggling to come back to reality.) Mingyu knows better than to expect a response from the elder male on days like this. Wonwoo hasn’t left the apartment all day. The shorter male is still wearing the same clothes from last night. Mingyu reaches out to him. He gently places a hand on the shorter male’s knee.

“Wonwoo,” Mingyu says softly.

            Wonwoo doesn’t look at him, as Mingyu expected. Mingyu frowns. The elder male brings the cigarette back up to his mouth and takes a drag. He blows smoke out the window. The sit like that for a while. On most bad days, Wonwoo would just stare out the window and not smoke. The elder male would press his knees to his chest and hug himself. But tonight is different. The shorter male must be having a horrible day.

            Mingyu knows what Wonwoo is doing. He’s learned out self- destructive behaviors in psychology. He rubs his thumb back and forth on Wonwoo’s knee. He tells the elder male that it’s okay. He knows deep down that it’s not okay. It’s not okay for Wonwoo to feel this way or let himself do this to himself. It’s not okay for Wonwoo to feel lonely or even hate himself. Wonwoo’s told him once that he feels lonely. After that, he’s found Wonwoo several times in the bathroom, sitting in the bathtub, clothes on, in a tub full of cold water mixed with blood. He’s helped him out of the tub and dried him up. He cleaned the cuts and flushed the razor blade down the toilet. It hasn’t been that bad in a while, but that doesn’t mean anything.

“Let’s go to sleep Wonwoo,” Mingyu suggests.

            The elder male doesn’t move. Mingyu doesn’t either. He wonders how bad today was. He guesses that he should be lucky that he didn’t find Wonwoo in the bathroom, half conscious. Mingyu is patient with Wonwoo. He usually waits until the elder male dozes off before carrying him to bed.

            Today is different, Wonwoo is smoking while staring out the window. Wonwoo only smokes when he’s anxious or needs to destress. Mingyu wonders if the elder male is going to take out another cigarette or now. In the end the elder doesn’t. Instead he closes his eyes and starts to doze off. Mingyu watches Wonwoo’s body relax. He gets up and picks up the elder male. He carries him to Wonwoo’s bedroom.

            He places Wonwoo gently on bed. He pushes up the elder male’s sweater sleeves and checks his wrists for cuts. He doesn’t see any new ones. He brings Wonwoo’s wrist to his lips and places a chaste kiss on one of the cuts. He does the same for the other wrist. The elder male mumbles something unintelligible. He climbs into bed next to Wonwoo. The elder male opens his eyes and stares at Mingyu.

“You’re home,” Wonwoo says.

“I’m home,” Mingyu repeats.

“Welcome back,” the elder states.

            Mingyu cards his fingers through Wonwoo’s hair and wonders if the elder male blacks out on these days or if he remembers. He tells the shorter male to go back to sleep and Wonwoo nods his head. He wants to ask the elder male so many questions. He wants to know if he’s okay. He wants to know if how his day has been. He wants to know what happened. He wants to know so much about Wonwoo, but Wonwoo isn’t willing to tell him. He sighs. He holds Wonwoo tightly like he’s afraid the elder male would disappear. Some times he’s afraid the elder will slip through his fingers.

            Wonwoo’s even breathes fill the room and Mingyu feels at ease. Wonwoo’s arms wrap around his waist, and the elder’s head is on his chest. He whispers a goodnight as he presses his lips against the crown of Wonwoo’s head. He drifts off to sleep, hoping that Wonwoo is okay in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh I suck at summaries....


End file.
